Dictionary
A Woman's Dictionary
1.Airhead
What a woman intentionallybecomes when pulled over by a policeman.
2.Argument
A discussion that occurs when you're right but she just hasn't realized it yet.
3.Balance the checkbook
To go to the cash machine and hit "inquire".
4.Bar-be-que
You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat, cleaned everything up, but he "made the dinner".
5.Blonde jokes
jokes that are short so men can understand them!
6.Cantaloupe
Gotta get married in a church.
7.Childbirth
You get to go through 36 hours of contractions he gets to hold your hand and say, "Focus...breath...push...Good Girl".
8.Eternity
The last teo minutes of a football game.
9.Exercise
To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.
10.Hair Dresser
Someone, who is able to create a style, you will never be able to duplicate again.
See also "Magician"
11.Lipstick
On our lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of our mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear.
12.Valentine's Day
A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card.
13.Waterproof Mascara
Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.
14.Zillion
The number of times you ask someone to take out the trash, then end up doing it yourself anyway.
What a woman intentionallybecomes when pulled over by a policeman.
2.Argument
A discussion that occurs when you're right but she just hasn't realized it yet.
3.Balance the checkbook
To go to the cash machine and hit "inquire".
4.Bar-be-que
You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat, cleaned everything up, but he "made the dinner".
5.Blonde jokes
jokes that are short so men can understand them!
6.Cantaloupe
Gotta get married in a church.
7.Childbirth
You get to go through 36 hours of contractions he gets to hold your hand and say, "Focus...breath...push...Good Girl".
8.Eternity
The last teo minutes of a football game.
9.Exercise
To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.
10.Hair Dresser
Someone, who is able to create a style, you will never be able to duplicate again.
See also "Magician"
11.Lipstick
On our lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of our mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear.
12.Valentine's Day
A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card.
13.Waterproof Mascara
Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.
14.Zillion
The number of times you ask someone to take out the trash, then end up doing it yourself anyway.
posted by Katie | 5:17 PM
7 Comments:
It is like you took the definitions from my own life!!
LOL
KATIE...LOL! You're SO funny!!!!
I have NO clue how to balance my check book, and hitting Enquire, is EXACTLY what I do.
That made my day...thanks for the laugh girl!!
pp,
anytime, anytime
I'm the same way...LOL
You forgot to add a little part to "hairdresser"
- The sexiest man in the world with a great sense of style and the ability to actually listen to you. So says his boyfriend.
lol, honkeie
sorry about that. I will do better next time!
I'm feelin' the line about barbecue! It always pisses me off when I work my ass off all day long, and then people are like, "Kevin, you did so good." HELLO - he sat outside and watched a fire cook meat for an hour while drinking a beer. I was the one working!!!
Post a Comment
<< Home